Just a pic of a polar bear...
From “He’ll Never Walk” to Hanoi.
Who is this book for anyway? Who should read it and why? How do I put it? “handicapped”, “physically challenged”, “differently abled”? I’m sure there’s a whole host of other politically correct terms I could come up with. But here’s the deal, anyone with a physically noticeable handicap and those whose lives are touched by them can draw some things from this book. In writing this, I did a lot of soul searching and realized I may have a few things worth sharing. Much of it you may already know. Many people with physical disabilities are inspirational to others, enrich their communities and live truly wonderful lives. You may not agree with all the ideas I share and that’s fine. That said, I hope you will do some thinking about yourself and relating positively to others. If you know a handicapped person, hopefully you will come away with a little of our prospective of the world and even a better understanding of yourself. I write from my heart and I think many things in this book apply to a lot of people and I have had many good life experiences to back up my thoughts and ideas.
Why am I writing this book? Well, I’ll tell you. One night I had just finished bringing in an oversized load of groceries after a long day at work. After getting everything put away I was dead tired! There’s nothing unique about my experience or is there more to it than just another weekday? I carried the items in small bags making five or six trips to and from the car. Then one by one, I put each thing away. I was also quite happy with myself. I do things a little differently than most people because I’m put together a little different. I’ve learned over the years through much trial ad error how to live on my own despite considerable physical limitations. It seems like knowledge worth sharing. It is more than just figuring out day-to-day tasks, I think it also takes a certain kind of attitude to overcome obstacles day in and day out. This is the most important message. Slow down, take each problem one at a time and create the necessary steps to overcome it.
Uncle Ho's Monument, Hanoi Vietnam
Once a guy asked me to describe my condition over the telephone and I did not really know how to begin. Not because I’m shy about it or have complexes, rather I was just not sure how to proceed. There’s no good way to get it across. I really still can’t. But let me try. The Doc’s call it Arthogryposis Multiplex Congenita (AMC) but I call it a bunch of conditions that they don’t really know what to make of so they lump them together. For some unknown reason the connection from my brain to a number of muscle groups do not work, so the muscles do not develop. It limits movement in both my arms legs hands and even my feet. My right leg is just a little shorter than the left but I can still walk fairly well just not real fast or too far. This will give you the idea, remove one shoe and walk around a little paying attention to your lower back. It’s a different way of getting from a to b. but it is doable. I also have what they call clubfeet. They are small and bend in toward the toes. It’s kind of a miracle I can walk on them at all but they get me around pretty well. My arms are much shorter than usual and my hands bend in at the wrist. My hands are small and the fingers do not bend all that much. As far as AMC goes, my case is middle of the road. Some people have much more severe limitations than I do and have even bigger challenges to deal with. If you look up AMC on the internet you will not find all that much. It’s very rare. Because of that, the research dollars are not there the same as for more well known diseases such as Autism or Multiple Sclerosis. It’s not all negative physically for me. I have a very strong back and neck. A strong person can lift from laying on the floor on my back to standing up the floor easily by simply putting their hand behind my head and standing me up like a 2x4! I also know how to fall with out getting hurt (most of the time)! If I trip (which is rare thank God)) I turn on the way down and usually land on my back avoiding injury. Most look out in front of them while walking. I do also but spend about half the time watching carefully where my feet are going. If I fall where there is nothing like a chair or a couch around to pull myself up on I’m stuck until somebody helps me out. Believe me I’ve learned to be careful! Yes, you can find me in a crowd real easy! I do stand out! But that’s not a bad thing really. It is all in how you use what you got.
Me a long long time ago and John's VW Van. Who is John? (He's in the book).
Yes, I could lay out of work, collect some kind of disability money and be an alcoholic couch potato but after a week or so that would get old. Sad to say but our society would find that acceptable. If you are reading this you likely already know how bad daytime TV is. So with the help of many others, I went out into the world, got a degree in English and another in Aviation Management for fun and then a Master’s Degree in Conflict Resolution. A lot of people age and start to slow down, settling into routines and schedules. For me it has been just the opposite in many ways. I’ve slowly learned how to do more things on my own, got stronger mentally and physically, and most importantly realized there is nothing more important than living up to one’s full potential. Yeah, I hope I have learned a thing or two about life worth sharing. In this world there is little we can accomplish alone. We all get help from others. But it all starts from with in each of us reaching out to others. We make the world we live in for good or bad, trust me on this one! If you look for and always expect the worst in others, that is what you will get.
All good parents encourage their children to meet and overcome adversity in some way or another; sports, academics, art, community involvement and tons of other ways. My parents are no exception. They decided not to hide me away from the world but toss me in headfirst. I went to the same schools as my non-handicapped peers almost right from the start.
Clouds and moon, thanks NASA.
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